I am finishing my first week of refocusing my efforts towards Feeding my Purpose and Purposeful Movement... things did not go too well, but that's just part of the deal.
The first day for me going back to healthy habits is always super optimistic- I stock my apartment with the right resources (in this case, optimal foods), and I meditate on a plan of action (in this case, exercising). The first 6 hours of my refocused efforts go great- I'm all in on the Broccoli and weight lifting.
But when I go to exercise, something feels different. The 8 hours of sleep and the healthy vegetables are not providing me with seemingly endless bounds of energy that I'm used to when practicing these healthy habits. Instead, I feel quite sluggish as soon as I start my workout. I feel tired, weak, and unmotivated. When I do my first pushups, my muscles and bones feel achy, and I feel like uncomfortably fat. Each pushup drains energy from me, rather than exciting me to keep pumping them out. My muscles almost seem to be angry with me, and it feels almost like my intentions and my body are not on the same page at all.
So... I cut my workout short, insisting to myself that my great diet will compensate for my poor workout, and that in a few days my body will get back to being on the same page as my intention. Abs are made in the kitchen after all, right?
Well... that sentiment is all well and good... but since I've been eating sub-optimally for a few weeks/months, my body is not yet "in the groove" with optimal eating. In other words, I feel like crap, even though I'm eating optimal foods. In fact, I feel worse than when I was eating crappy foods. I also start getting weird headaches, which I am convinced is a body shock reaction from the lack of crap.
The bad feelings quickly gives way to cravings. My body doesn't feel great and something in my subconscious mind immediately goes to my drug of choice- SUGAR! And not just any kind of sugar-- I need the 'crack' of sugar-- that processed, acellular, unnecessarily caloric sweetness bomb dropped into my body now.
That feeling doesn't go away. I will shovel 1000 calories of protein, fat and vegetables in my gullet, and although my stomach is full, my body feels completely unsatisfied, and empty in a very bizarre way. Even though I've ate more than enough food, my thoughts are in overdrive about all the junk I want-- ice cream! nonono, caramel popcorn! nonono.... gluten free cupcakes! Wait... what about those new gluten free cookies at the store I saw???
At this point, I feel completely out of control. I almost feel like a Being John Malkovich type situation where I am fully experiencing what's going on in this foreign body that I have no control over. When I am in full-on sugar-crave-mode, it feels like the biological inmates are running the asylum. I am officially no longer in control of my thoughts when I am in this state. I feel driven by outside forces; my thoughts and impulses don't feel like my own. It's a terrible feeling. It feels imprisoning and suffocating. It is complete loss of free will. It is scary, and it is at this point that I realize that something evil has taken over my body. I am possessed by a demon; and I need to work to regain control of my beautiful vessel.
This demon-battling continues for many days. I have to constantly avoid going out to buy bad foods. I have to force myself to keep shoving optimal foods in my face. And just as importantly, I need to get into the gym consistently to establish my Purposeful Movement.
Amidst my torturous week of eating, I notice things besides the cravings are getting a little easier every day. My sleep gets more restful and consistent, and my workouts become more enjoyable and invigorating. My muscles during warm-up pushups no longer feel achy and disconnected; but rather they feel vital and full of energy. After doing a few pushups, my body feels propelled forward, as if the pushups reactivated a power plant of life force. I suddenly feel excited, almost aroused, to do other physical exercises in my Purposeful Movement routine. Suddenly, I'm really enjoying resistance training again!
The same thing happens with my bike riding-- on day 1 of optimal eating/moving, the bike rides feel like torture, and I often go very slow and not very far.... even my sweat feels weird. But by day 4 or 5 of Purposeful Movement and Feeding my Purpose, I feel like I can't wait to tackle the big hills around Denver, and I feel myself pushing harder and farther than before. Suddenly, sweating and being out of breath feels great!
The most obvious result of being able to eat healthier and move healthier is that I feel great going about my day. When I am eating and moving optimally, everything else in my life falls into place. My sleep patterns become more optimal, I look better in the mirror, and I don't have any nagging or depressing thoughts competing with my intention-driven thoughts. After a couple weeks of optimal eating and moving, my mind and body feel completely free of distractions and burdens. My vision is strong and clear, and I am able to achieve my personal goals and also be a blessing for those around me.
However, more importantly, when I eat and move in optimal ways, I am able to expand my conscious vision beyond myself and my family. I feel so good in this optimal physical state, that I can Cultivate Purpose for myself and my family, and also have enough energy and ambition left over to Cultivate Purpose for more of the world around me. I'm able to understand economic issues, political systems, society, and power dynamics more clearly, and I am more motivated to elevate the spirit of the world, rather than just satiate my own hedonistic impulses and/or ensure my family's well being.
When I align my body and mind with optimal physical habits like eating and moving, I seem to tap into a universal energy that makes me feel personally great, and also motivated to spread that great feeling to every possible person I can. I can feel a transformational shift, beyond the personal, and towards the universal. I just feel so damn good when I'm eating and moving optimally, that I start thinking about ways to spread that incredible feeling to others.
And ultimately, that is why I think Feeding Your Purpose and Purposeful Movement are among the most important things we can do to Cultivate Purpose. It cleanses our mind and bodies, so we can have clear vision and align our intentions with our actions. From there, the clear vision becomes so expansive that we end up helping the world well beyond ourselves.
Thus, this can be viewed as the first step towards changing the world for the better. We heal ourselves, and then we seek to heal the world around us. It begins inside of us.
And that is why Cultivating Purpose to this point has been about changing ourselves, while the ultimate result of Cultivating Purpose is about changing the entire world. And that's what we're going to get into with Cultivating Purpose moving forward - changing and healing the world. We're going to do it in ways no one in human history has ever been able to; and we're going to do it together, as a massively powerful community of like-minded social and spiritual warriors. And it all starts by turning inward, being introspective, and Cultivating Purposeful Movement while also Feeding our Purpose. I look forward to hearing about your own personal journeys with Purposeful Movement and Feeding Your Purpose. Leave comments below!
Namaste.